Pranks Mean 'I Love You'

All of the best holidays go on long past their actual calendar date. Christmas trees stick around until June, and isn’t the best trick-or-treating done on a crisp February dawn? April Fool’s is no exception, so below find some classic pranks which your co-workers, friends, spouses and fellow gang members will find endearing.

Note that some of these are terrible ideas and could potentially result in jail time. So only do them if you think they’re REALLY funny.

Voice Activated Copier

Print off several papers reading “ATTENTION: For your convenience, all copier commands are now voice-activated.” Then tape the announcements to all the copy machines at your office or nearest Kinko’s when nobody is looking. Stake out a good viewing position and enjoy the bedlam.

Infinite Escort Loop

Call an escort service and inquire about prices. Strongly imply that you will pay an exorbitant amount of cash if they sleep with you after dinner. Call another service and ask for an escort of the opposite sex. Repeat the above conversation “on behalf of a friend.” Have them meet at your favorite restaurant. Extra points if they fall in love.

Glitter Bomb

If you have a ceiling fan with a pull cord, put it out of sight on top of the blades. Now make a fake pull cord and attach it to a Styrofoam cup full of glitter. Glitter never comes out. Ever. Your friend or lover will have to shave their head and burn all of their clothes, and people will still suspect that they’re an enchanted fairy.

Mature Way to Handle Ex’s

Hire a model. Hire a photographer. Make embarrassingly goopy pictures with the two of you falling all over each other. Send out resultantly horrid “Save the Date” invitations to anyone you’ve ever dated or wanted to have sex with but couldn’t. If they call to congradulate you, say your fiancee is a hedge fund manager but you met at the yoga or kickboxing class they instruct.

English Teacher’s Revenge

Go onto your friend or co-worker’s computer. Type almost correctly spelled words like “neccessary,” “equiptment,” etc.

Add them to the computer’s spell checker.

Scary Noise

If you have a roommate, put on a gorrilla suit and hide in your kitchen. Wait until they’re in bed, then text them and say, “I think I heard something in the kitchen. Can you check it out?”

Note: Also a good prank to shake up children with overly balanced emotional states.

Technicolor Refrigerator

You would be amazed what a little blue food dye can do to your significant other’s ice cream, milk or clam chowder.

If you can keep it, you deserve it!

Find a gym with a phone booth outside. When someone you know walks past the phone booth, call it. When they pick up, put on your wackiest radio voice and say: “You’re on the air with KTLK 103.9! See that body builder with the gym bag walking past you? We’ve put a thousand dollars inside the gym bag and it’s yours! IF you can successfully get it from our man!”

Gas Prices + Psychology

Find your friend’s car in the parking lot. Open the lid to their gas tank. Set a funnel and half an empty bag of sugar next to the tire. Walk away.